The line

When I first heard the idea that every character in a drama is you, I thought that was preposterous. But since I've transformed, I've developed a liking for that idea. Because the line between Russia and Ukraine goes right through us. We have an autocratic part, and a democratic part. We have a Sith path and a Jedi path. The Sith path is one where empathy doesn't matter, it's just about building your death star. The Jedi path is more humble, more intimate, more connected to nature. The Sith path is just getting things done without thinking of complications. The Jedi path accepts all connections. 

I was talking to a woman who was working for the DOE in NYC for the first time. The Byzantine rules and lack of flexibility and empathy were difficult for her. She could reach outsider children who couldn't adapt to the routines and expectations. But she was tortured by the everyday brutality of the place, to herself and the children. These little connections were meaningful, but it was all overwhelming and frustrating. 

I woke up today and read Hannah Cox Richardson's note about Zelensky asking for aid. The lines are clear. Russia has been de-globalized in the matter of days, economically isolated, because the world doesn't want this kind of paranoid aggression. 

It's so obviously wrong. In an effort to secure his borders, he invaded a country. Like there's enough buffer in the world from yourself. Like the line of evil doesn't run through yourself. Now he punishes the generals who didn't anticipate this global isolation. 

The exceptions to this isolation are quite jarring. Not surprisingly Koch, the fellow who funded the divisions in America, is against sanctions for Russia. There are obvious politicians who are bought off by Russia. It's so odd that these people exist. They feel foreign, I have disavowed this shadow of selfishness, and lack of vision. But I too am selfish and lack vision in my selfishness. I have lost the expansive viewpoint to do great wrongs about people I imagined I cared about but in the end proved I didn't by my betrayal.

We can work on the wars within ourselves, and the wars outside ourselves. 

For the first time I got the fear that this war might expand and become World War 3, where every nation takes a side. Nearly every nation has taken a side against Russia. Strangely India wishes to "remain neutral", which is taking a side. The American legislature has Russian assets. There are Americans fighting with the Russian army.

I thought about Hemingway going to Spain and seeing that brutal war. Franco ruled over Spain from 1939 to 1975 as a dictator. I wonder what that has done to the Spanish consciousness. I chose to be a fan of Barcelona over Real Madrid because Real was Franco's team, and Barcelona was more for democracy. Now it's not as neat and tidy as that might present, but I can't hop on board the Rangers versus Celtic, because that's Protestant versus Catholic. I like Inter, because it's international. It's not lost on me that Utah's team is called Real Salt Lake, and Miami's team is Inter Miami. The divisions of dictator versus internationalism run through America in their pastime. Real Madrid is the most successful team in soccer, they have won the most Champions League titles in Europe, the heart of soccer. Everywhere has soccer, and the MLS has caught up to Mexico in soccer, mostly because of the influx of international players. My own team NYCFC has two Americans playing for them out of 11, Johnson and Jasson. Jasson has Argentinian and Spanish heritage through his father and mother, but he went to Yale and was born in Greenwich Connecticut. Gray is a player on the MLS Cup team from the Bronx, but he is injured and not playing right now. Gloster came in, he's from America. Vuk has Serbian heritage. Even the Americans have heritage from other places, in their parents. Inter Milan was created because AC Milan wanted purity on the team, only Italians. The story isn't really that simple, but maybe it's part of an impression of it. There's a great book called How Soccer Explains The World by Franklin Foer. 

In Buddhism Mara is the devil type character, but he's about distraction away from awareness. He presents anger, lust and greed situations to get yourself outside of yourself. To narrow your concerns. What you need to do, like Padmasambhava, is to befriend your demons. Jung says you ignore your shadow at your peril. We are all the characters in the drama. Disavowing parts because we don't like the idea of them isn't going to work, we need to keep an eye on them. I need to keep an eye on the Trump part of my nature.